And why cannot I reconcile myself to the prospect of death?

为什么我不能接受死亡的前景？

I reconciled myself to the worst that could happen-in my case, dying.

我让自己接受了可能发生的最坏情况——就我而言， 死亡。

Though suspicions of Brown and Hamilton were not unfrequent, I could not reconcile myself to the idea that they were instrumental to my imprisonment.

尽管对布朗和汉密尔顿的怀疑并不少见，但我无法接受他们对我的监禁起到了推动作用的想法。